DOA: Dead or Alive (2006)

DOA: Dead or Alive (2006)

Starring: Jaime Pressly, Devon Aoki, Holly Valance, Sarah Carter, Natassia Malthe, Kane Kosugi, Collin Chou, Eric Roberts, Silvio Simac, Derek Boyer, Kevin Nash, Brian J. White, cameo by Robin Shou

Director: Corey Yuen

Action Director: Corey Yuen, Guo Jianyong

I think a lot of people were excited about this when the trailer came out. Corey Yuen had always been a dependable source for martial arts-infused female empowerment movies, and So Close was still reasonably recent in people’s minds. Being based on a fighting game meant that there would be a lot of action. Being based on a female-centric fighting game meant that there would be loads of eye candy. And the trailer, which showed hawt Australian actress Holly Valance topless as her bra fell on her chest and a gun in her hand at the same time, meant that it would be exaggerated, but in a fun, sexy way. Sort of a Charlie’s Angels meets Enter the Dragon, which is essentially what this film is.

Like Enter the Dragon (or Mortal Kombat), we have three main protagonists. The first is Kasumi (Devon Aoki, of War and Sin City), a ninja princess living in Japan. Her brother, Hayate (Collin Chou, of The Matrix Reloaded and Promising Young Boy), disappeared a year ago after leaving the clan to fight in the DOA tournament. Rules for ninja princesses are strict and she cannot leave her castle—these things still exist in modern-day Japan? But she does, prompting Hayate’s former girlfriend, the purple-haired Ayane (Natassia Malthe, of the Bloodrayne sequels), to mark her forth death.

Next, there’s Tina Armstrong. Tina has made it huge as a professional wrestler, although now she wants to prove that she is the real thing (not unlike Johnny Cage). Her dad, Bass (Kevin Nash), is also a wrestler and wants her back in the WWW(hatever). But she needs to undergo her own hero’s journey and accepts an invitation to the DOA tournament, albeit not before beating up some pirates (led by Robin Shou in a cameo) who try to hijack her yacht. 

Finally, we have Christie Allen (Taken’s Holly Valance), a cat burglar and assassin. When we meet her, she has just robbed a bank in Hong Kong with the help of her lover, Max (Matthew Marsden). Max is a bit of a prick and has ratted her out to the police, which leads to the aforementioned scene of her fighting the cops in her hotel room while wrapped in a towel. While making her getaway, she gets an invitation to the DOA tournament, lured by the promise of a 10-million-dollar prize if she wins.

The three meet up on the plane ride to the island, although tournament rules require them to jump out of the plane, parachute to the beach, and climb a tower to get to the big Chinese-esque mansion where the tournament is held. Joining our heroines are Ryu Hayabusa (Blood Heat’s Kane Kosugi), who may be the same guy from the “Ninja Gaiden” games; Bass; some DJ named Zack (Brian J. White); and a couple of Chinese fighters that the film doesn’t concern itself with. The tournament is run by Dr. Victor Donovan (Eric Roberts, of Best of the Best and The Expendables), who organized the tournament as part of the will of his former partner, Dr. Douglas. The two ran a huge scientific megacorporation or something. Oh, and the late Dr. Douglas’s daughter, Helena (Sarah Carter), is participating in DOA this particular year. That makes her the fourth female protagonist.

The DOA tournament plays out in four rounds: the preliminary elimination round, the quarter finals, semi-finals, and the finals. Each combatant is given a watch that, at any given moment, will display the face of their next opponent. A fight can start at any time or take place in any part of the island. There are some other things going on: Ayane has snuck onto the island and is determined to kill Kasumi. Christie and Max would like to find the island’s vault and clean it out, if possible. Kasumi and Hayabusa want to try to find out if Hayate is still on the island. Plus, Dr. Victor Donovan has his own plans for the fighters…

Anyone who comes into a movie like this expecting a plot should feel ashamed of themselves. There is one, but it builds up to a silly conclusion. The dialog is pretty bad for the most part. And as expected, Devon Aoki has but a single facial expression, making Kristen Stewart look like a paragon of dynamic range. But we’re not here for that sort of thing. We want fighting and hawt women, which this film gives us in spades. Like the video game, we even have an extended interlude of bikini volleyball in between the fight sequences. And Sarah Carter roller blading around in a sports bra and booty shorts for know reason. And let’s not forget two hot blondes…fighting…in skimpy clothes…in the rain…in slow motion. Make no mistake: Dead or Alive is basically the 1990s Mortal Kombat film filtered through the lens of a 14-year-bold weened on Internet porn. 

That doesn't mean this is a great film in any sense. The low-budget CGI makes the film look rather chintzy in places. The gimmick with the high-tech sunglasses at the end is quite silly. Devon Aoki should have never been allowed to step in front of a movie camera. Tomonobu Itagaki, creator of the DOA games, had actually wanted Kasumi to be played by City Hunter’s Kumiko Goto (and for Ayane to be played by Azumi’s Aya Ueto). I would much have preferred that to have been the case, although Natassia Malthe does look cute in a purple wig. And then there’s the action…

The fighting is a mixed bag. Jaime Pressly had started training in martial arts while working on the Mortal Kombat TV series. Holly Valance had trained in Muay Thai at some point in her youth. But all of the actresses had to undergo a four-month crash course in wushu, kung fu and wire-fu during this film’s pre-production phase. The only actors who were the “real deal” were Kane Kosugi, Collin Chou, Robin Shou (whose part is negligible), and Unleashed’s Silvio Simac, who plays Leon. The problem is that much of the action is obscured by quick cuts and bad camerawork, especially during the first half of the film. There is a lot of wire work used in the fights. And being a Corey Yuen film, there is one moment where a fighter throws out both of his feet and kicks his opponent’s legs out from under him (or her).

There are a few choice fight sequences, though. The best fight is the one where Kane Kosugi beats up an army of guards while snooping around the island compound, Enter the Dragon style. It even ends with him getting trapped between a pair of iron doors. That sequence is followed in short order by an extended sword fight in a bamboo forest between Kasumi and Ayane, which was very much influenced by House of Flying Daggers. Incidentally, this movie was filmed at the same studio in Hebian, China where that movie was made. But that fight is pretty good, too. Tina’s fight with Zack isn’t bad, but the extended fight between Helena Douglas and a bunch of sword-wielding guards was a lot better. 

Unfortunately, although finale has some decent kung fu on display, the fact that the film builds up to fighting Eric Roberts reminds me of Game of Death, where Bruce Lee has to fight his way past Dan Inosanto, Ji Han-jae and Kareem Abdul Jabbar, only to throw down with Hugh O’Brian. I also lament that the film didn’t complete the actual tournament. At least the progression of the tournament was done in a logical manner, although how Hayabusa moved onto the semi-finals after getting captured is a mystery.

If you liked Charlie’s Angels (2000), but thought it needed more fighting…or if you liked Mortal Kombat (1995), but felt it needed more female skin, then this is the movie for you. But if you want Corey Yuen at his female-fu best, stick with So Close or Yes, Madam! If you want Corey Yuen at his female-fu sleaziest, check out Women on the Run. This has its moments, but didn’t quite become a guilty pleasure for me.