Dynasty Warriors (2021)

Dynasty Warriors (2021)
Chinese Title: 真·三國無雙
Translation: Real Three Kingdoms Matchless

 

Starring: Wang Kai, Han Geng, Louis Koo Tin-Lok, Tony Yang Youning, Coulee Nazha, Ray Lui Leung-Wai, Mickey Yuan Wen-Kang, Philip Keung Hiu-Man, Yang Haoyu, Lam Suet, Justin Cheung Kin-Seng, Eddie Cheung Siu-Fai, Law Kar-Ying, Paul Chun Pui
Director: Roy Chow
Action Director: Dion Lam

 

We’ve gotten a handful of movies about the Three Kingdoms Era of China in the past 15 years, most notably the two-part epic Red Cliff by John Woo. That was a great pair of movies, let me just say right here. Anyway, we also got Daniel Lee’s a little more commercial Three Kingdoms: Resurrection of the Dragon the same year the first RC came out—Lee employed more commercial actors, his own retinue plus beloved veterans like Yueh Hua and Ti Lung. The Lost Bladesman cast Donnie Yen in the role as the infamous Guan Yu, setting the story some time after the events of Red Cliff. The Assassins is set even later than that, with only Cao Cao being alive by that point. There have also been a couple of TV series about the subject in the meantime.

Before going on, I made a small spreadsheet of some common characters that are in this film that also appeared in the aforementioned movies, just so you know who has played who over the years. Check it out below. 

Dynasty Warriors is a big-budget adaptation of a popular video game series, of which I never played. The movie is basically Romance of the Three Kingdoms:  Year 0, set before the Han Dynasty splintered into rival kingdoms, with Cao Cao and his machinations trying to reunify China, albeit under his control. However, based on a video game in which I assume you play famous generals taking on enemy armies all by your lonesome, this takes the larger-than-life antics of John Woo’s Red Cliff movies and exaggerates them to MCU (or Kung Fu Hustle) proportions.

The movie begins in 184 A.D. with the Yellow Turban Rebellion, which was a sort of peasant rebellion led by a charismatic figure named Zhang Jiao (Phillip Keung, of Flirting Scholar and The Heroic Trio). The movie portrays Zhang as a powerful Maoshan sorcerer, who uses his powers to transform his army into rage zombies(!) to fight against the Han forces, led by General Dong Zhuo (Lam Suet, of Exiled and The Mission). Only the timely intervention of the three warriors Liu Bei (Taiwanese actor Tony Yang, of Cold War 2), Guan Yu (Han Geng, of A Chinese Odyssey: Part 3), and Zhang Fei (Justin Cheung, who’s been in Category III films like 3D Sex and Zen and 3DD Invader) save the army from annihilation. However, as the three men are “freelancers” and lack official rank, Dong Zhuo is less than grateful for their assistance.

Some time later, Dong Zhuo has risen to the rank of Chancellor and replaced the child emperor with his half brother, through whom he’s able to control the entire empire. He’s also helped himself to the late Emperor’s concubines while raping the now-deposed child emperor’s mother. And the man is just a general tyrant. However, all of the royal advisors and top-ranking officials are afraid of him, especially since he’s always flanked by Lü Bu (Louis Koo, of every HK film of the past 12 years), the most powerful martial artist in the kingdom. In this adaptation, Lü Bu wields a magical halberd and has Super Lightning Powers, making him the (evil) Thor of the Han Dynasty.

Liu Bei, Guan Yu, and Zhang Fei decide that they need to remove Dong Zhuo from power and put the original child emperor back on the throne. They go to a magic forest where they are transported to a secret level—what else can I call it?—and meet the Lady of the Sword Castle (Carina Lau, of Project A II and Detective Dee and the Mystery of the Phantom Flame). She gives them Super-Hyper-Duper Powerful Weapons (Liu Bei gets twin swords; Zhang Fei gets a spear; and Guan Yu gets his trust kwan do) and tells them that they need to join forces with Cao Cao. Cao Cao (Railroad Tigers’s Wang Kai, looking like a young Tony Leung Chiu-Wai), formerly Cao Mengde.

We learn that Cao Cao was a low-ranking military officer who nonetheless occupied a space at the Court. While all the other officials were content with sitting around and lamenting the state of the Empire, Cao Cao was willing to do something about it: he tried to assassinate Dong Zhuo. He failed and was injured by Lü Bu during his escape, but eventually was found and nursed back to health. He eventually used his family’s connections to raise a small army and join the rebel forces, led by Yuen Shao (Flash Point’s Ray Lui). Cao Cao lets Liu Bei and his cohorts join him, as Cao Cao can see the courage and loyalty in those three men. “Courage and loyalty” is repeated ad nauseam throughout the movie.

Dynasty Warriors is a strange example of a 4-act movie, which story-structure is not very common in film. The first act establishes our main heroes and villains. The second act is an extended flashback telling Cao Cao’s backstory, painting him as a somewhat cynical warrior and strategist who desires to unify China and keep the empire alive, even if it means that he’ll have to be a Major League Prick in order to do so. The third act revolves around the efforts of our three main warriors to ingratiate themselves with the Rebel Armies, which is ultimately accomplished thanks to Guan Yu’s Supreme Ass-Kicking Skills and a duel with a powerful warrior named Hua Xiong (Jin Song, of The Myth). The final act revolves around the Battle of Hulao Pass, which is an actual historic event (and presumably chapter in the Romance of the Three Kingdoms epic).

The dialog is mainly exposition and speechifying about “Courage” and “Loyalty” and all that sort of crap. I would have preferred a bit more explanation of the geography of Hulao, because the locale is described as a “choke point” (i.e. nobody gets to the capital without going through the pass), but there seems to be multiple ways through the pass. We needed more dialog about military strategy and less ruminations on heroism and heroic vs. selfish motivations. I think these conversations mainly set up the differences between Liu Bei (100% righteous) and Cao Cao (same general aims, but backed by a huge sense of personal ambition). There is also a number of interactions between Cao Cao and Guan Yu, which set up the “Bromance” between those two historical figures that was furthered explored in The Lost Bladesman.

While lots of money was spent on costumes and special effects, my general thoughts on the visuals is that they “occasionally impressive, but sometimes very chintzy.” The costumes are sometimes impressive, but sometimes look like glorified cosplay outfits. Zhang Fei (who gets the short shrift among the protagonists) looks like a man in a fat suit wearing black face; it’s really pretty sorry. Far-away shots of the actors’ doubles riding horses are fine, but a close-up of Guan Yu riding into battle is very obvious green screen nonsense. There are lots of CGI energy blasts, which are fine for CGI. But non-stop scenes of dozens of nameless soldiers being tossed into the air looks like the worst moments from the Matrix Reloaded infamous “Burly Brawl.” And did we really need a scene in which Liu Bei parts the river that runs through Hulao Pass, only for Louis Koo to ride his horse sideways across the water wall toward him?

The action was supervised by Dion Lam, who’s experience with traditional swordplay mixed with CGI goes all the way back to The Storm Riders and A Man Called Hero. He also assisted Corey Yuen in staging the battle sequences in the Red Cliff movies, which is quite evident here. The formations that Liu Bei’s men use against Lü Bu’s forces at the Battle of Hulao Pass are similar to those used in the first Red Cliff movie, but with less visceral impact because director Roy Chow would prefer to focus on Louis Koo playing Thor and electrocuting dozens of people with a single lightning bolt.

There are some more traditional weapons exchanges here, although most of them rely on heavy wire assistance. We get a friendly duel between Liu Bei and Cao Cao, which is very early 00s Ching Siu-Tung in its presentation (think Hero). Something similar happens with Guan Yu in his showdown with Hua Xiong. Those two fights are probably the best in the film, because they don’t rely on flaming crescent blasts and ground-splitting energy techniques. The few “realistic” moments of the battles are fun to watch, but unfortunately are quickly eclipsed by the CGI superpowers. In that case, you’re better off revisiting the Red Cliff movies (or Three Kingdoms: Resurrection of the Dragon), for entertaining Three Kingdoms action.

Dynasty Warriors ends on a cliffhanger, with the small stub of a subplot involving Lü Bu falling for Diaochan, a young lady betrothed to the oversexed Dong Zhuo, promising to become a point of contention between the two men. Liu Bei and Cao Cao are now allies, but uncomfortable ones, given that the latter’s ambitions are growing by the year. Unfortunately, even if a sequel is made, I’m not all that excited at the prospect: I don’t need another two hours worth of pointless speeches about honour peppered with scenes of dozens of men flying into air a lá Kung Fu Hustle in my life.

Double World (2020)

Double World (2020)
Chinese Title: 徵途
Translation: Journey

 

Starring: Henry Lau, Peter Ho Yun-Tung, Lin Chenhan, Jiang Luxia, Him Lo Chung-Him, Bobo Hu Ming, Kira Shi Shi, Mark Cheng Ho-Nam, Wang Zi-Yi, Tiger Xu Ming-Hu
Director: Teddy Chen
Action Director: Stephen Tung Wai, Fan Yizhu, Zhang Mang

 

I think I’m starting to lose my once-great memory in my old age[1]. I watched this movie early this year—or late last year, and all I could remember from it was that I liked it more than I was expecting to. Big-budget epic Chinese fantasies are really hit and miss, and my initial thoughts on it were that it fell on the lower end of “hit.” But before I sat down to rewatch it earlier this week, I could honestly not remember a single thing from the movie. I kinda remembered one tournament events, but that was about it. Characters, set pieces, and story elements had become a complete blur in my mind. Is it that my memory is starting to fade (a scary thought)? Or was it just a forgettable film? And this coming from a guy who has a good memory of bland 70s basher film like The Brave Lion!

The movie opens with some subtitles informing the viewer that the Fantasy Asia-land the story takes place in is divided into two rival kingdoms: Southern Zhou and Northern Yan. After year of war, a stalemate was reached between the kingdoms and fighting came to a standstill for a number of years. However, the new King of Yan has decided to end the ceasefire and start war again. We then meet the political heads of the Zhou kingdom, which include the young king and Royal Tutor Guan (Bobo Hu Ming, of 1911 and Iceman: The Time Traveler). The former is the subject of an assassination attempt by Yan emissaries—one of them is killed in combat and the other is slaughtered by Guan’s pet lion(!). They decide to go forward with a traditional martial arts tournament to determine the army’s Field Marshall, who will lead the king’s armies against Yan forces.

Meanwhile, in some desert wasteland east of the Zhou capital, the Hu Xiao people live in a set-up that looks cribbed from Mad Max: Fury Road. The men spend their days toiling in mines while the women wait in line to get water from the local magistrate, who usually stops distributing it before everybody in line can fill up their pitchers. That doesn’t stop Dong Yilong (Henry Lau), a young orphan with video game-esque jumping skills and dodges authorities a lá Aladdin. He steals water and all sorts of things, but manages a happy-go-lucky attitude, even after he gets caught. In any case, the Royal Decree reaches the Hu Xiao Clan and they are required to send three volunteers to the capital, under threat of clan-level genocide. Dong  Yilong, a former soldier named Chu Hun (Peter Ho, of The Monkey King and The Sword Master), and some arrogant little jerk sign up for the quest. That last one gets killed by giant CGI scorpions a few minutes after they start their journey.

While crossing the desert, Dong Yilong makes friends with warriors from the Lizard Clan after saving their leader during a sandstorm. They also meet a girl who had stolen the Lizard Clan’s token to enter the tournament—her name is Jinggang (Lin Chenhan) and she wields a Claymore-class weapon, despite being shorter than the weapon itself (shades of Sayu and Noelle from Genshin Impact). Long story short: Jinggang eventually joins the Hu Xiao Clan team to make up for the death of nobody-cares-what-his-name-was. Chu Hun also “accidentally” buys a slave girl from Northern Yan named Bi Nu (Jiang Luxia, of Vampire Warriors and Coweb). Bi Nu happens to be the daughter of a general whom had been slain by Chu Hun’s brother (Tai Chi 2’s Mark Cheng, in a cameo) years before. Also, it was at that same battle that Royal Tutor Guan had failed to send reinforcements—we learn early on that he’s actually a spy for Northern Yan—to Chu’s army, resulting in his brother’s premature death. So Chu Hun and Bi Nu have axes to grind, and its Dong Yilong and Jinggang’s goodness and compassion that keeps everybody together throughout the ordeals of the competition.

The tournament isn’t your average martial arts fight fest. The first event involves the contestants running across a GINORMOUS cargo net made of large chains, making their way over a pit of spikes while giant iron balls rolls back and forth, threatening to crush anyone in their way. The second event feels cribbed from Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, in which the contestants have to steal an egg from a giant dragon in a cave filled with poisonous flowers and carnivorous vines. And the last event? Well, there’s only ONE Field Marshall on the books,  you know.

Teddy Chen is usually dependable for big budget mayhem with a bit of heart. From Purple Storm to Accidental Spy to Bodyguards and Assassins, the man knows his way around large scale action and strong visuals. With Double World, which was apparently based on a video game (or online RPG), he demonstrates that same basic knowledge of making his films look good and scoring (for the most part) on the action front. Most of the main characters have their important emotional moments, some kind of a backstory, and have chemistry with their co-stars. And like most Hong Kong films, there really is no plot armor for anyone in the cast. Anyone can die at any time.

Henry Lau reminds me of a shorter Jaycee Chan, although Lau is a bit more charismatic than Jackie’s scion. He doesn’t provide the story with much martial arts, however, which is left to co-stars Peter Ho and Lin Chenhan. Sadly, Jiang Luxia is mainly wasted in the role of a character who is brooding for revenge for most of her screen time. Peter Ho experiences most of the character development, as he goes from angry and cynical to something a little more heroic. Henry Lau’s compassion is his defining trait throughout and he is likable, but also a bit one note in his goodness.

The action sequences were overseen by Stephen Tung Wai, with Fan Yizhu and Zhang Man handling the fight choreography itself. Fan Yizhu has performed stuntwork on a number of high-profile films in the past decade or so, and was assistant action director for Detective Chinatown and God of War. Zhang Man has a similar résumé, although he cut his teeth as an action director on The Monkey King 3: Kingdom of Women (the one nobody remembers or talks about). The action is mainly swordplay and spear swinging, with a few small doses hand-to-hand combat. The fighting is wire-assisted at every turn, so people who hate wuxia movies on account of their “unrealistic” will have plenty to complain about here. The choreography on the whole isn’t bad, and there are several weapons combat sequences and a few pretty solid weapons exchanges, too.

Stephen Tung Wai did get nominated for a Best Action Design Award, although he lost to Ip Man 4 for obvious reasons. It’s actually kinda interesting, because usually when Stephen Tung Wai and Teddy Chen have teamed up, it has resulted in a win for Stephen. Just see Downtown Torpedoes; Purple Storm; The Accidental Spy (where Tung Wai teamed up with Jackie Chan for the action); and Bodyguards and Assassins. Moreover, Stephen Tung Wai was part of the trio that directed the fighting for Kung Fu Jungle, alongside Donnie Yen and Yuen Bun. That also won the award. So the Tung Wai-Teddy Chen collaboration were five-for-five until this film came around, in which they lost to Donnie Yen and Yuen Woo-Ping.

Double World is a fun little fantasy epic, but there’s a good chance that you won’t remember it a few weeks after you see it. In other words, it’s a typical big budget blockbuster—disposable entertainment at its slickest and most forgettable.

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[1] - I turned 40 this year.

Yakuza Princess (2021)

Yakuza Princess (2021)
Original title: A Princesa da Yakuza

 

Starring: MASUMI, Jonathan Rhys Meyers, Tsuyoshi Ihara, Eijiro Ozaki, Toshiji Takeshima, Mariko Takai, André Ramiro, Toshi Tanaka, Yumiko Yuba
Director: Vincente Amorim
Action Directors: Agnaldo Bueno, Ricardo Rizzo

 

Yet another movie that pits a female action hero against the Yakuza, following in the footsteps of Kate and (to a lesser extent) Everly. Yakuza Princess stands out by being a Brazilian production, set in Brazil and based off of a Brazilian manga, that being Samurai Shiro. Despite the number of Brazilians behind the camera and being filmed in bairro of Liberdade, the Japantown of São Paulo, the fact that most of the dialog is done in English and Japanese means that the end result doesn’t feel particularly Brazilian. It is probably the weakest of the female-centric movies I’ve reviewed as part of this particular cycle.

Following the massacre of an important Yakuza family in 1999, one of dead boss’s chief enforcers rescues his infant daughter, Aki, and whisks her away to Brazil, raising her as his own grandchild. She grows up to be Akemi (Japanese-American singer MASUMI), who studies kendo and works in Liberdade in a small kiosk selling electronics and other knick-knacks. Her grandfather has since passed…or in fact, was murdered during a mugging gone wrong. On her 21^st birthday, she goes to a club to sing karaoke and meets a couple of would-be rapists…whom she puts down with her martial arts skills.

In a parallel storyline, a Caucasian man (The Children of Huang Shi’s Jonathan Rhys Meyers) wakes up in a São Paulo hospital after having been in a coma for an undisclosed period of time. His face is covered with deep slash marks and, as we have learned, the police found him unconscious in the street holding a katana sword. The man—whom we’ll call Shiro—has amnesia and has no idea who he is or how he ended up in Brazil holding a samurai sword. Shiro eventually escapes from the hospital—which include a scene of him walking around with his bait-and-tackle in full view—and starts looking for answers. He visits an antique shop in Liberdade whose owner, under threat of decapitation, gives him Akemi’s address.

Meanwhile, back in Osaka, a Yakuza lieutenant named Takeshi (Tsuyoshi Ihara, of Ninja and 13 Assassins) is interrogating a fellow Yakuza for embezzlement when the guy whispers something particularly interesting in his ear. Takeshi kills the man and the two enforcers charged with torturing the guy. He then hot-foots it to Brazil, presumably because he now knows about Akemi’s existence.

The three plot threads eventually meet at Akemi’s apartment, when the would-be rapists show up looking for revenge. Before they can violate her, Shiro appears out of the shadows and starts hacking at them with the katana he stole from the hospital. Akemi touches the blade at one point and goes into automatic Ichi mode. And then, Takeshi shows up and starts putting bullets in everybody who isn’t dead. Akemi and Shiro barely make it out alive. A conversation with her kendo teacher—he grows pale when he sees the katana—ultimately puts her on a path to discover her heritage and the real identity of late “grandfather.” Meanwhile, the Yakuza who assassinated Akemi’s family are now in São Paulo, too…

First off, this movie looks good. The production values are fine and the bairro of Liberdade is filmed in a way that make it far more attractive by night than it does during the day. The photography is strong throughout and, like Kate, this is just a beautiful film all around.

Much like other recent movies about the Yakuza—Everly; DARC; and Kate—this film is very violent. There are several decapitations and limb severings, including loving close-up on a severed hand and its stump. The opening bloodbath is pretty hardcore, as the killers do not even have mercy on children. Beyond that, there are bounteous stabbings, slashings, shootings and hackings. The blood flows abundantly in Yakuza Princess. I’m actually surprised that this film didn’t merit an “18 anos” rating in Brazil, considering the level of the graphic violence on display plus the prolonged exposure to Jonathan Rhys Meyers’s cojones.

There are some editing issues: almost every scene in this 110­+ minute film probably runs about 20-30 seconds longer than need be. You get the feeling that director Vincente Amorim wanted to do something artistic: “Manga is art. So this needs to be equally artistic, too!” It does drag the film more than it should, however. And if the scenes last longer than they should, then the opposite is true during the fights. The editing there is chaotic during some of the fights.

The biggest liability is MASUMI, who plays the titular character. Sadly, she apparently graduated from the Devon Aoki School of One-Expression Acting, and her delivery is frequently in a flat monotone. She does manage a bit more emotion in a few scenes, but otherwise is more wooden than a bokken at an Aikido school—I’d say shinai, but those are bamboo.

The action scenes were directed by Brazilian stunt coordinator Agnaldo Bueno, who is basically the only real stunt coordinator here, as far as I can tell. He did some stuntwork in Hollywood films like The Expendables and Fast Five, plus some fight choreography in a Brazilian soap opera called Negócio da China. The fights, however, were staged by a local named Ricardo Rizzo, whose filmography I haven’t been able to identify. The fights are just okay. The best one occurs near the end, where MASUMI and Tsuyoshi Ihara face off with a trio of assassins in a storage room, two of whom are dressed like rejects from a Kill Bill audition. I say it’s the best mainly because it’s the most protracted. Most of the fights end in a few hits or sword strokes.

Yakuza Princess is mainly a curio for people who simply like movies involving the Yakuza and/or katana blades. Or those who need to see every single female-centric action thriller ever made. Guilty on two of three of those counts.

Kate (2021)

Kate (2021)

 

Starring: Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Woody Harrelson, Miku Patricia Martineau, Tadanobu Asano, Jun Kunimura, Michiel Huisman, Miyavi, Mari Yamamoto
Director: Cedric Nicolas-Troyan
Action Director: Jonathan Eusebio, Akihiro Haga, Hiroo Minami

 

In my review of The Old Guard, I classified it as a bit of an outlier in the recent batch of female spy/assassin action thrillers, due to its fantasy elements and strong male presence among the protagonists. Kate, on the other hand, fits neatly in the mold. Much like The Old Guard, it draws a lot of inspiration from the John Wick films, although this time it is more understandable: the executive producer is David Leitch, who produced the JW trilogy (and helped direct the first one). While TOG took its primary inspiration from Highlander, this one instead borrows from the classic film noir D.O.A.

The titular character, played by Mary Elizabeth Winstead of Birds of Prey, is a female assassin working for some shadowy agency. Her handler is Varrick (Woody Harrelson), who raised her to be a killer after she was orphaned—her parents were murdered when she was young. While on a mission in Osaka, Kate is forced to shoot her target dead…in front of his young daughter. Although, she does go through with the hit, she starts to have reservations about the job.

Ten months later, Kate is now in Tokyo awaiting her next mission: kill the head of the Kijima Clan of Yakuza (Jun Kunimura, of Godzilla Final Wars and Tomie: Forbidden Fruit). Right when she’s about to pull the trigger, she starts feeling sick and accidentally misfires, hitting Kijima in the shoulder. On the run from both the police and the Yakuza, Kate steals a car—a slick sports car covered in neon led lights, including underglow--and makes a break for it. Unfortunately, she blacks out and gets in an accident, just in time for the police to find her.

Kate wakes up the next day at the hospital, where the doctor informs her that she has been poisoned. Not just any poison, mind you. Someone slipped her a mickey filled with polonium-204 and now she’s dying of radiation poisoning! Talk about your awful way to kick the bucket! Could it have been the guy she picked up at a bar for a one-night stand? Maybe. She escapes the hospital by taking the doctor hostage before fleeing. Her new mission: find Kijima and kill him before she herself dies. And to get to him—the man rarely goes out in public—she finds herself having to kidnap his niece, Ane (Miku Patricia Martineau), who happens to be girl who watched her father get gunned down in Osaka. Things are about to get very interesting, very fast.

I do like the poisoning angle of the story, since it keeps the suspense going throughout the movie. Just like the proverbial “bomb under the table,” the fact that Kate will just keel over dead from radiation poisoning at any moment means that any delay, any setback, any small injury she acquires will make it that much more difficult for her to complete her mission. Moreover, the movie makes it clear that she will probably not make it out of this movie alive, so the question “will she successfully get her revenge” hangs over every scene. Attentive viewers will notice that the wounds on her body get worse and worse as the film progresses, as the radioactive isotope ionizes more and more of her tissues and organs.

Mary Elizabeth Winstead is an interesting choice for a film like this. She did show off her action chops in Birds of Prey, for which she got a significant amount of praise. And she played an exceptionally resourceful female character in the paranoia-suspense thriller 10 Cloverfield Lane. Winstead also has a solid horror background, with roles in the Black Christmas remake; Final Destination 3; and Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter. She plays the role of a someone who has lived a subhuman life, who discovers her own humanity during her last hours of life. She is completely believable as the hard-as-nails Kate who, while on a mindlessly-violent quest for revenge, sees her young self in her hostage and starts to truly care about someone. This is especially true as the film reaches the inevitable tragic conclusion.

Playing foil to Kate is the young Ane-chan, played by newcomer Miku Martineau. This is a trickier character, since she’s full-on teen rebel when we first meet her, so much of her dialog is laced with profanity—both in English and Japanese. While the other characters use swearing sparingly, she goes all Samuel L. Jackson on the audience and honestly, it starts to get grating. It’s mainly in the last few scenes that she really puts on a performance worthy of the character. The rest of the supporting cast is made up of seasoned veterans, from the always dependable Woody Harrelson to Tadanobu Asano (No. 13 Neighbor and Fearless).

The action was provided by the 87eleven Stunt Team, with Jonathan Eusebio being the uncredited stunt coordinator and supervisor of Winstead’s combat training. Mary Elizabeth in fact had started training with them before for Gemini Man and Birds of Prey, with a regime that included jiu-jitsu and boxing. Moreover, she trained in with the Thai military—Bangkok stands in for Tokyo in some scenes--in the use of sniper rifles. For the most part, the action satisfies, although like The Old Guard suffers from a climax that is dwarfed by the earlier set pieces. Along for the ride in the choreography department are Japanese stuntmen Akihiro Haga and Hiroo Minami. Both men have extensive experience in Japanese tokusatsu shows, while the latter has also worked as Hiroyuki Sanada’s stunt double in a number of recent projects.

The first big fight occurs at a Japanese club, where Kate faces off with more than a dozen Yakuza enforcers armed with tanto daggers. This is a particularly brutal fight, with Winstead switching back and forth between her gun and knives as she dodges attacks from multiple attackers. In one memorable bit, she stabs a guy through the bottom of his mouth and the blade comes up through his nose(!). Not only is the choreography sound, but the photography, editing and art direction of the entire sequence are all tops, too. In fact, the entire movie looks great and just a fantastically-shot action opus.

The second big action sequence is a kinetic gunfight set in a series of back streets populated by outdoor restaurants. Kate has to navigate these smaller streets and alleyways as several Yakuza hitmen open fire on her. In one part, reminiscent of Jeeja Yanin’s Chocolate, Kate has to negotiate a series of platform-like window sills, jumping from one to another like a deadly real-life video game.

Finally, the showstopper for many viewers is a fight with a Yakuza bigwig in the penthouse of a posh apartment building. Kate’s opponent is played by famous Japanese musician Miyavi (Bleach and Kong: Skull Island), and their showdown is absolutely fera. Knives, bottles, corkscrews and other objects become deadly weapons as the two just beat the hell out of each other until one of them—or both—are simply unable to continue. And for a fight this intense, it’s only appropriate that it ends in an equally-brutal way, with one character getting part of their head taken off in surprising manner.

It’s such a shame the finale is so conventional and, shall I say, “safe.” Oh sure, there are a lot of bullets fired, but it lacks the panache and creativity of the other action sequences. Thankfully, Kate benefits from better pacing than films like Ava and The Old Guard, with the set pieces being well distributed throughout the film. So even though the climax doesn’t quite get the adrenaline running like the earlier ones, it doesn’t feel like you’ve been waiting forever for little payoff. And with the strong cast, great production values, and impeccable technical aspects, it makes Kate a worthy recommendation among female-centric action films.

 

 

The Old Guard (2020)

The Old Guard (2020)

 

Starring: Charlize Theron, KiKi Layne, Matthias Schoenaerts, Marwan Kenzari, Luca Marinelli, Chiwetel Ejiofor, Harry Melling, Veronica Ngo
Director: Gina Prince-Bythewood
Action Director: Daniel Hernandez, Johnny Gao

 

We’ve been getting a lot of female spy/assassin action-thrillers as of late. The trend (probably) started around 2010 with Angelina Jolie headlining the blockbuster film Salt. In the past few years, however, the production of these films has ramped up, especially from 2020 to the present. I’m guessing it has a lot to do with the success of the John Wick movies, but there may be other factors involved. The Old Guard is sort of an outlier in the lot, being less a female-empowerment action film and being more John Wick by way of Highlander.

The premise of the film is pretty simple: Charlize Theron (Atomic Blonde and Mad Max: Fury Road) plays Andromache, or “Andy” for short, a Scythian warrior woman who is one of a small band of immortals that roam the Earth. A born fighter, Andy had joined forces with a number of other immortals to work as mercenaries to order to improve the world. Her compadres are: Booker (Red Sparrow’s Matthias Schoenaerts), who discovered his immortality while fighting in the Napoleanic Wars; Joe (Marwan Kenzari, of Black Adam and the live-action Aladdin), a Muslim warrior from the Era of the Crusades; and Nicky (Luca Marinelli, of the 2021 Diabolik remake), an Italian knight who fought Joe in those same wars before becoming his lover.

When we meet the team, the four are meeting up in Marrakech (in Morocco) sometime after their last mission. A former CIA agent named Copley (Redbelt’s Chiwetel Ejiofor) has contacted them to conduct a rescue mission in southern Sudan. Some Islamist militants have kidnapped a bunch of schoolgirls because…well…girls shouldn’t study in fundamentalist Islam. Andy reluctantly takes the job—she’s weary of taking jobs in the same region too close together—and it turns out to be a trap. They are gunned down by a bunch of heavily-armed soldiers, although their immortal abilities allow them to get back up and dish out the death to their enemies. Knowing they’ve been set up, Andy sends the other three to their safe house in Paris while she investigates the possibility of a new immortal.

The rookie would be Sergeant Nile Freeman (KiKi Layne), a Marine serving in Afghanistan. Her immortality is revealed when she shoots a terrorist, who then slices her throat open as she’s tending to his wounds (the mission was to take him alive). The next day, she’s alive and well, with nary a scratch where a huge cut should be. Obviously, the entire company now looks at her suspiciously and the military has plans to ship her away into isolation. Andy shows up in the nick of time to rescue Nile, although the latter is very reluctant at first.

At the same time, we learn that Copley is in the employ of the evil Big Pharma CEO Merrick (Harry Melling, best known for playing Dudley Dursley in the Harry Potter films). Merrick wants to experiment on the immortals in order to determine the secret of their longevity and healing factor and change the world…while getting filthy rich in the process. Copley tracks the mercenaries down to their Paris hideout and, in the ensuing melee, capture Joe and Nicky. That leaves Andy, Booker and Nile to rescue their compadres, but there’s a catch: Andy’s wounds are now taking longer to heal, which means that her immortality is now reaching the end of its cycle.

As an action movie, The Old Guard is adequate entertainment. It runs into the snag that many action films do: the best action sequences occur early on and the pacing is interrupted by a slow, exposition-filled second act. The climax, for all it wants to be a John Wick movie, is also weak, even with the added “suspense” of Andy’ failing “health.” A weak middle section is especially bad in this case of this particular credit, since it leans back on the “hero(ine) refuses to accept her destiny” cliché for drama. I have a personal disgust for that story trope, so any movie in this day and age that employs it is likely to get on my bad side.

I also think that the movie needed a bit more imagination. There are a few brief flashbacks set in period, especially pertaining to Andromache’s tragic backstory involving another fellow immortal, played by Furie’s Veronica Ngo Thanh Van. I would have liked to have seen more scenes set in period to establish what it had been like to be a Scythian warrior or for two crusaders on opposite sides to fall in love. While the immortals do use swords and axes in some of the action sequences, I would have liked to have seen more creativity in the make-up and costume design. The idea that you’d have a Scythian barbarian woman dressed like Aeon Flux killing people with automatic weapons doesn’t feel like the writers were really milking the premise for all its worth.

Moreover, I felt that the main villain being an evil CAPITALIST was a bit weak sauce. I mean, his motivations are sound given the industry he works in, but he’s not particularly imposing and since his henchmen are all normal humans, there’s not a lot real competition for the heroes to overcome. A sequel is apparently in the works, and the final scene suggests that it will pit immortals against other immortals, so that should be interesting.

The action sequences were staged by Daniel Hernandez and Johnny Gao. Hernandez has been a stuntman in Hollywood for 20 years now, working on all sorts of action and fantasy films. In recent years, he has graduated to fight choreographer, contributing to the action sequences in Thor: Ragnarok; the last two Avengers movies; and most recently The Woman King (which was also directed by Gina Prince-Bythewood). Gao hasn’t been working in Hollywood that long, but recently assisted in the fight scenes for Dr. Strange in the Multiverse of Madness and The Woman King—both he and Hernandez must have really gotten along with Gina Prince-Bythewood. Hernandez trained Charlize Theron for the film, teaching her elements of aikido, judo, karate, and HEMA, or Medieval Martial Arts[1]. Theron looks good in her fights, matching her nicely-played cynical do-gooder with the requisite physicality.

As I said before, the first two set pieces are the best. In the first one, the protagonists take on a room full of soldiers, fighting them off with guns and swords—Charlize Theron’s character fights with an axe. It begins with a Highlander-esque display of our heroes’ indestructability, and then becomes a complexly-choreographed scene, a web of blocks, parries, slashes and gunshots. I have to say it really sets the stage for the rest of the movie. Sadly, the scene only lasts about a minute and the rest of the movie doesn’t live up to it.

The next fight is a one-on-one fight between Andromache and Nile, who still hasn’t accepted her destiny as an immortal. The fight is set on a cargo plane and is a nice, old-school exchange of punches and blocks, Hong Kong style. KiKi Layne tends to stick with more brawling moves, while Charlize Theron focuses on grappling and joint locks. There is a nice move where she runs up the side of the plane to flip around KiKi, bringing her down in a jiu-jitsu lock. It was probably wire assisted—there is a wire operator listed on the IMDB—but it looked neat.

The climax is mainly standard gunplay, with Theron throwing in some judo moves a lá Keanu Reeves in John Wick. As I said, there isn’t much suspense of the immortals getting killed because…well…they’re immortal. Charlize gets to kill people with a fire axe and then throws down with a hulking security guard armed with a dagger in a one-sided fight (in her favor). It’s a competent set piece, but it doesn’t get the adrenaline pumping like the earlier sequences did. And after the slowly-paced middle section, I wanted a bit more than a tamer version of John Wick to conclude this film.

 

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[1] - According to one article, her training included everything from Chinese wushu to Greek pankration to Israeli krava maga - https://castingfrontier.com/charlize-therons-intense-training-for-the-old-guard/.

Furie (2019)

Furie (2019)

 

Starring: Veronica Ngo Thanh Van, Mai Cát Vi, Thanh Nhien Phan, Pham Anh Khoa, Kim Long Thach, Khanh Ngoc Mai, Hoa Thanh
Director: Le-Van Kiet
Action Directors: Kefi Abrikh, Yannick Ben, Marc David, Raimundo Querido

 

Vietnamese action cinema was looking promising in the late 2000s. The Rebel, which featured the strong martial arts cast of Johnny Tri Nguyen, Dustin Nguyen, and tonight’s star Veronica Ngo, was a great martial arts film with a strong plot and great fights. Two years later, Johnny and Veronica teamed up again for Clash, which was also a very good martial arts-action film. Shortly afterward, Dustin and Veronica teamed up for the (relatively) big-budget fantasy-epic Once Upon a Time in Vietnam. Unfortunately, at the same time, Vietnamese censors banned Johnny Tri Nguyen’s very personal project, Chinatown, which meant that it couldn’t get an international release, either. Johnny Tri Nguyen left the film industry in disgust and we were thus robbed of one of the great screen fighters of the 21^st century. We didn’t hear much out of Vietnam afterward—although both Dustin Nguyen and Veronica Ngo continued getting work outside of Vietnam—until 2019, with the release of Furie.

Hai Phuong (Veronica Ngo, who had roles in The Old Guard and Star Wars VIII: The Last Jedi) is the daughter of well-known master of Vietnamese martial arts. Unfortunately, at the end of her adolescence, Phuong leaves home to be with her boyfriend of questionable morals, getting disowned by daddy in the process. As you can expect, a boyfriend from the wrong side of the tracks is never a good idea, and Phuong ends up working at a girl’s bar and ultimately gets pregnant out of wedlock.

Ten years later, Hai Phuong and her daughter, Mai (Mai Cát Vi), are now living in some small fishing village a sizeable distance from Saigon. Hai Phuong is eking out a living as a debt collector for the local loan shark, which has earned her an understandably negative reputation among the locals. The womenfolk dismiss Phuong as a whore for not only being a single mother, but for (gasp!) not being married despite being in her late 30s—the hussy! Mai’s schoolmates harass her on a daily basis, and Mai now wants her mom to get into a more respectable profession. A potentially-violent encounter with the relative of one her recent targets convinces Hai Phuong that Mai may have a point.

The next day, Hai Phuong takes some pearl earrings into the village to pawn off in order to buy a fishing boat. Two things happen that will change Hai Phuong’s life forever: first, Mai is accused of stealing a wallet by the busybody women of the local market. The resulting argument ends with Mai telling mommy “I hate you” and running away. Then, a gang of organ traffickers visits the village and absconds with Mai. Despite Hai Phuong’s martial arts skillz, she is unable to rescue her daughter. So, she follows the kidnappers to Saigon and begins a relentless search for her daughter, before it’s too late.

Furie is a strong action-thriller vehicle for actress Veronica Ngo, who also produced the feature. In her earlier movies, she got ample time to demonstrate her fighting talents, but was still second fiddle to her male co-stars. Here she is the center of attention and not only gets to beat the hell out of the Vietnamese underworld, but show off her acting chops, too. To be fair, she had her moments of emotion in both Clash and The Rebel, but this is tour-de-force for Miss Ngo. There is a strong male supporting character in the form of police detective Luong (Thanh Nien Phan), but he doesn’t show up until the second act and doesn’t have anything to do until the climax.

The story is pretty standard child trafficking fare, which we’ve seen in films like Taken; Out of Reach or Skin Trade, with an emphasis on the organ theft aspect of the industry, which had been done recently in movies like SPL 2: A Time for Consequences and Paradox. In this case, we spend enough time with the character of Mai that we can feel for her once she is kidnapped, while the process of transporting and organ-robbing the children is explained in such a way that we know that she only has a few hours to get rescued before she bites it. With stakes this high, the suspense factor is high and every moment that Hai Phuong loses brings her one step closer to absolute tragedy. And since most Asian action movies DO NOT screw around, you just know that they go there if they think they need to.

The action scenes were staged and directed by the quartet of Kefi Abrikh, Yannick Ben, Marc David and Raimundo Querido. All four are French martial artists who have done a lot of stuntwork in diverse European productions, and Abrikh recently choreographed the fights for the female empowerment fairy tale The Princess (from earlier this year). They do a respectable job on the fight scenes, which range from “good” to “great.” There are two showstoppers among the fights. The first pits Veronica Ngo against a former member of the gang, who now runs a motorcycle chopshop, played by The Lady Assassin’s Pham Anh Hoa. It’s a complicated scuffle inside a very small house as the two fight with tools, with the latter’s mother in the background pleading for both parties to stop. It plays like the brutal Indonesian equivalent of a Jackie Chan fight, as they use wrenches, screwdriver and a hammer, and often perform complex movements in order to get a tool away from the other without losing it themselves.

The big showdown pits Veronica against the female leader of the child traffickers, played by Hoa Thanh. Veronica’s Hai Phuong character had already had one scuffle against this lady, who has the structure of a bodybuilder and the fighting skills to boot. Their second and final confrontation takes place on a train that is quickly arriving at the drop-off point for the children: if Hai Phuong doesn’t win here, it’s all over for Mai and other other children. What ensues is the 2019 equivalent to the famous Joyce Mina Godenzi/Agnes Aurelio showdown from She Shoots Straight (with a dash of The Raid 2). Can Hai Phuong’s maternal instincts triumph over Hoa Thanh’s brute strength?

If you have watched movies like Clash and The Rebel, you know that Vietnamese movies take no prisoners in the context of the storyline. Just knowing that there is never a guarantee of the infamous trope of the Hero’s Battle Death Exemption, in which a character is often outmatched by the villain (or monster or killer) will survive just because they’re the hero. So when Hoa Thanh starts beating the heck out of Hai Phuong during the finale, there is a honest chance that the latter will not make it out alive, or will not win in time. And this uncertainty carries on right to the last scene, always keeping the characters’ fates up in the air. Thus, Furie doesn’t do anything new, but it does it with the right doses of righteous ass-kicking and suspense, thus meriting a recommendation.

31 Days, 31 Years of Horror (Starting in '31)

31 Days, 31 Years of Horror, starting in '31 -- So for Halloween this year, I watched and reviewed a movie (or two) per day, with each day of October representing a year, starting with 1931. Here is the line-up:

Murder by the Clock (1931) - Remember that scene in Wayne's World 2 where Kim Basinger seduces Garth and then tries to convince him in a round-about way to kill her husband? That is basically this movie for 74 minutes. Lilyan Tashman plays Laura Endicott, a sexy-but-horribly-amoral monster who is not above using her body (or the promise of it) to convince people to kill for her. The movie makes no effort to hide her villainous credentials, so the question is not "Who dunnit?", but rather "How will the plan go wrong?"

Apparently this was the first horror movie to be released in the wake of the monumental success that was Universal's adaptation of Dracula starring Bela Lugosi. It's nominally a horror film, especially by today's standards. It's not quite mystery; I suppose you can call it the great-grandfather (or -mother) of the sort of erotic thriller that became popular in the 1990s with Basic Instinct.


Murders in the Rue Morgue (1932) - An early Poe adaptation produced by Universal Studios when they were the Kings of Horror. This one has little to do with the source material, save a scene or two; the main character, Dupin; and the presence of an ape.

What we have is the evil Dr. Mirakle (Bela Lugosi, decked with a wondrous unibrow) trying to prove the Theory of Evolution in 19th century France by injecting gorilla blood in the local female population. The blood solution proves fatals to the local strumpets, so perhaps he needs a virgin instead. And maybe, just maybe, Camille, the girlfriend of med student and amateur detective Pierre Dupin, will suffice.

On one hand, you have some decent set design and matte paintings, plus Bela Lugosi chewing up scenery with nonsensical speeches about evolution that would make even Lamarck spin in his grave. But then again, you have a gorilla that is played by a chimpanzee in close-ups, and a ratty costume when seen from a distance. And as much as I'm not a fan of presentism, the four main characters' racist dismissal of the Middle Eastern belly dancers in the opening carnival scene makes me wish the gorilla would just strangle everyone.

The Vampire Bat (1933) - A little German village is terrorized by a murderer who drains the blood of his victims. The superstitious population thinks the supernatural is afoot and that a vampire has made his home in town. The local constable, Karl Brettschneider (Melvyn Douglas), is a bit more modern and practical and thinks that it's "just" a very talented serial killer. Just who is right in this case?

I owned this movie on VHS for many years--I think I got it as a present from one of my aunts. I only watched it once, however. Young me only wanted to see non-stop monster action, and this movie is very talky. As an adult, I can appreciate some of the photography and editing--the wipe-away effect is used for scene transitions, probably an early example of that. And Fay Wray was not only beautiful, but this role didn't require her to spend the second half screaming, so she's pleasant to be around.

The Ninth Guest (1934) - Interesting film based on a novel (and a play), all three of which predate the publication of Agatha Christie's And Then There Were None... by a few years. Eight people high upon NYC's social ladder are invited to a party in the penthouse of a 50-story skyscraper by an unknown host. Once inside, a voice on the radio informs them that they will die one by one, unless they can outwit him (or her). Cue the deaths, revelation of secrets and growing paranoia among the victims.

Much like the 2004 film Mindhunters, there is an overwhelming feeling that the "host" is not only a beast when it comes to psychology, but that his powers of reason border on a Professor X level of mind reading. But if you can suspend disbelief in that regard, the film is a fun watch. I like how the host points the guests to a bottle of caustic acid for those who "don't want to play the game"; a few minutes later, one of guests tries to poison EVERYBODY ELSE just to ensure his own survival. Well, that explains that person's invitation to the party right up front.

The Werewolf of London (1935) - This film tells the story of a botanist (Henry Hull) who finds a nigh-magical plant in Tibet that is nourished by the moonlight and blooms at night. He is attacked by a werewolf during his journey, but survives and brings the plant back to England. He learns from a Japanese scientist (Swedish actor Warner Oland, best known for playing Charlie Chan) that the plant serves as a temporary respite from lycanthropy and that he himself has contracted it. As the moon enters its "Full" phase, the botanist finds himself transforming into a werewolf and targeting his long-suffering wife.

The portrayal of the werewolf in this movie falls somewhere between Lon Chaney Jr.'s mindless killer and then-contemporary depictions of Mr. Hyde. He does mangle beautiful women all over London, but he doesn't forget to put on his jacket, hat and scarf before leaving his lab to do so. I did like his first transformation, in which the camera is placed so that he walk by a column or some obstruction, only to emerge on the other side with more make-up on.


The Rogues Tavern (1936) - Another murder mystery set in a single location--a hotel--with the guests being brought together by a series of mysterious telegrams, and then start dying one by one. The killer leaves bite marks in their necks. Is there lycanthropy afoot? Another pair of guests, a detective and his girlfriend, are on the case!

I liked the killer's modus operandi and the would have enjoyed it better if the film's hero weren't such a sexist boor. Seriously, he's a complete jerk to his fiancée, right up to the final shot. I would have preferred a subversion of the trope and had him be completely useless while his girlfriend--a former department store detective--did all the heavy lifting (although she does make a lot of contributions to the solution).

Sh! The Octopus (1937) - Apparently, this is a parody of a parody--parody #1 being The Gorilla (filmed in both 1927 and 1930, both of which are lost) and the subject being The Cat and the Canary (which isn't lost). In modern terms, it's the Scary Movie (or Shriek If You Know What I Did Last Friday the Thirteenth) to The Gorilla's Scream.

Basically, a bunch of different people wind up in a lighthouse on a stormy night, including a painter, two salty sailors, two idiot detectives, the daughter of a scientist-inventor, and a couple of other people. The lighthouse may be the hideout for an arch-criminal called The Octopus. Plus, there appears to be a highly-intelligent giant octopus roaming the grounds, too.

The film has a giant rubber octopus and a nice moment of sudden make-up change at the end, which was really nifty. I like the setting, which includes the cabin next to the lighthouse, a hidden control room, and a series of caves located in the basement of the cabin. Otherwise, it's just a lot of motor-mouthed banter from the two detectives that might have been funny in 1937, but only made me smile once or twice (now in 2022).

Chamber of Horrors (1940) - Another crime mystery, this time about a rich guy who dies and leaves his estate to his young son. Most curiously, the family jewels are to be placed in the family crypt along with the dead man's body, behind a door closed with seven locks, to be opened only when the young master comes of age and gets married. 10 years later, the young master's cousin, a pretty young lady from Quebec, receives word from his aging tutor, who needs to get something off his chest...

Outside of the King Kong property, I believe this is my first film based on the works of crime writer Edgar Wallace. His works were frequently adapted in the 30s and 40s, and then became a cottage industry in Germany in the 60s, where they were called Krimi films. Chamber of Horrors was an fun little mystery with gloved hands killing people, a room full of torture devices, paintings with holes where the eyes should be, and lots of double crossing. Recommended.

The Wolfman (1941) - I'd actually never seent his one before. It's a classic tale of the duality of man's nature. In this movie, Larry Talbot (Lon Chaney Jr.) comes back to England to become the heir to his father's estate (the father being played by Claude Raines). He gets bitten by a werewolf one evening while trying to saving a young lady and becomes the titular creature.

Lon Chaney Jr. totally sells his character and gives him the likability he needs before he contracts lycanthropy so that you feel bad for him once he develops and unwanted alter-ego. Jack Pierce's make-up is also iconic, although for some reason, I thought the movie would give us a slow face transformation sequence--we get a reverse one at the very end. Recommended for horror fans, Twi-hards, and general fans of cinema.

The Cat People (1942) - A man falls in love with a Serbian woman (French actress Simone Simon) who believes herself to be cursed: legends say that her village descended into witchcraft and devil worship back when the Mamlukes were terrorizing her end of Europe (around the 15th century). The descendants of those witches could transform into panthers when angry, scared, jealous...or aroused. Although the two marry, the woman refuses to consummate the relationship because of her fear of the legend. Is it true? Or all in her head?

I suppose you could see this in part as an allegory for the ravages of mental illness on a marriage (and human relationships in general). One could conceivably replace "mental illness" with other things like "childhood trauma," "bad or incorrect traditions and beliefs," and stuff like that.


Frankenstein Meets the Wolfman (1943) - Like Jason Voorhees or Dracula, we open with a bunch of grave robbers visiting the tomb of the Talbot family...on the night of the FULL MOON. Upon opening Larry Talbot's coffin, his perfectly-preserved body (this should already be a warning sign for the robbers) is exposed to the light of the moon and he is revived. He sets out across Europe to find Maleva, the gypsy lady, and ask her what he can do so he can just die. She directs him to Castle Frankenstein, but the Baron and his sons are all long dead...

The movie was a lot of fun to watch, but doesn't bear up to more than two seconds' worth of scrutiny. The film is very wonky with the concept of time, although things like character motivation also suffer. It's the 1940s equivalent to a Hollywood blockbuster sequel that focuses so much on the action (since the first film or films took care of all the exposition) that the script forgets to make much sense.

The Mummy’s Ghost (1944) - The High Priest of Arkan (George Zucco) sends yet another priest (John Carradine) to the States to revive the mummy Kharis (Lon Chaney Jr.) so that they can reclaim the mummy of Princess Anankha and return her to Egypt. There's a slight snag in the plan: Anankha has been reincarnated into a pretty young girl (Rasmay Alves). More of the same as the previous two films—The Mummy’s Hand and The Mummy’s Tomb--but with a suprisingly downbeat ending.

The Mummy’s Curse (1944) - The "Kharis Saga" ends with this film, probably the worst of the bunch. The previous film ended with Kharis "drowning" in a Massachusetts swamp. This one has Kharis being discovered in a swamp...in the Louisiana bayou. Wait, what? Those Egyptian priests are at it again, resurrecting Kharis and trying to return Anankha's body to Egypt. But our reincarnated princess has also been resurrected (somehow) and may simply not want to go back.

The love story between the bland (and barely seen) male lead and his equally-bland (and also little seen) female counterpart is so shoe'd in that you can see the shoe horn marks all over it. Nothing is explained in terms of lore with regards to what happens to princess Anankha. Between this and the previous film, you get the feeling that Egyptian Gods are a bunch of Grade-A pricks who get off on resurrecting and reincarnating people just to kill them shortly afterward. And as usual, the villain' plot is ruined because one character wants to get in some immortal panties and pisses off the mummy.

Fog Island (1945) - Tycoon-turned-ex-con George Zucco invites a bunch people--those who cheated him and landed him a gig in the penitentiary--to his mansion at the titular locale with retribution in mind. Of course, being the greedy bastards they are, they accept the invitation on the off-chance that he might have liquidated some of his pre-prison fortune and hidden it there. Enjoyable little mystery-suspense, or "chiller" as they were called.

The Spiral Staircase (1946) - This film is actually a very well-made murder mystery with a hint of Gothic Romance to it. Dorothy McGuire plays Helen, a mute lady who works as a servant at a large mansion belonging to the Warren Family circa 1915. The village--somewhere in New England--has been subject to a number of murders in the past few days and the local constable thinks that Helen may be next.

One can see the Giallo influences in this film, from the black gloves we see whenever the camera focuses on the unidentified killer skulking around, to the occasional shots of the killer's eye as he or she watches his victims from afar. I can't help but wonder if Dario Argento hadn't seen this before doing Deep Red three decades later. I'm also pretty sure that it inspired Bob Clark for his Black Christmas, which also had some creepy eye shots of the killer and the characters' not realizing that the killer has installed themselves in the house.

Scared to Death (1947) - A notable film for being Bela Lugosi's only one shot in color. It also has an interesting, if poorly realized, gimmick of the film being told from the POV of the murder victim. A woman--a former French dancer--is convinced that her husband and father-in-law (George Zucco) are trying to drive her insane. Could it be one of them who is galavanting the grounds of the house wearing a spooky mask? Or perhaps it's the husband's sinister uncle, played by Bela Lugosi? Maybe the fast-talking (and ultra-sexist) reporter Lee can break the case! Just kinda ho-hum in the end.


The Creeper (1948) - Interesting mix of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde and Gaslight. A team of scientists returns from the West Indies, where they developed a special serum derived from cats, to continue their research stateside. The head scientist of the team has an adult daughter who suffered some trauma over there--she works as an assistant lab technician--and is now deathly afraid of cats. Meanwhile, murders are occurring around the laboratory--the victims are scratched to death. Just what's going on? This is one of those movies that could be remade effectively--at 64 minutes there's a lot of material that could be expanded upon and explained better.

Destination Moon (1950) - Yeah, yeah. This isn't a "horror" movie. Like the previous year, horror films were in short supply in 1950. So, I went with the essential science fiction movie of 1950 and arguably the one that set off the 50s Sci-Fi craze (it also won the Oscar for Best Special Effects). Besides, since costume manufacturers have gone so far as to make "Sexy Astronaut" costumes, a classic movie about astronauts is allowed.

The plot is pretty simple. Two years after the failed launch of a rocket, a top scientist and his general pal build an atomic engine with the hopes of going to the Moon. They convince a brilliant engineer-industrialist to participate in the project and bring all his fellow industrialist cronies onboard to help finance it (with the help of an in-film cartoon starring Woody Woodpecker). There are lots of roadblocks along the way, but they ultimately make it to the Moon. But getting back is another story.

I once started watching this during a session of TNT's Monster Vision circa 1992, but switched it off because it was a bit dry for my tastes--I always preferred more fantastical takes like The First Men in the Moon. But there are certain movies that you respect on the grounds of their being pioneers in a genre, no matter how much better the acting, casting, filmmaking technique or special effects quality have improved over time. This is one of them.


The Son of Dr. Jekyll (1951) - Very fascinating take on the material is less about the monster portion of the story and more of an analysis of the fallout of Mr. Hyde's actions on society as a whole. I felt like this was an attack on sensationalist journalism--which we know is problematic in the UK, where the film is set--and the Court of Public Opinion. It speaks of a society whose members are willing to ruin a man's reputation and life in order to profit (even indirectly) from any given media circus.

Do we have that today? Does it represent the inherent "dark side" of the Freedom of the Press, similar to how Hate Speech represents the dark side of the Freedom of Speech?

It would be interesting to watch the 1920, 1931 or 1941 versions of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde and then follow it up with this one (taking some of the "retcons" in stride).

The Black Castle (1952) - This is another Universal Studios production, ranking down with Curuçu on the list of their more obscure horror efforts. I thought it was fairly enjoyable stuff; nothing great, but a decent way to spend 70 minutes.

Richard Greene plays Sir Ronald Burton, an 18th century military officer who has returned from a jaunt in West Africa. He heads over to the Black Forest in Germany to visit the evil Count Karl von Bruno, who might be responsible for the deaths of two of his colleagues. When we meet Von Bruno, we learn that his castle has a dungeon full of torture devices AND a crocodile pit. Surely an upstanding citizen.

Universal horror veterans Boris Karloff and Lon Chaney Jr. have supporting roles here. The former plays a doctor whose loyalties are uncertain. The latter plays the mute, hulking manservant of Count Von Bruno.


The Maze (1953) - Fascinating Gothic Horror film that feels like a hybrid between the Gothic Romances of the previous decade and the sci-fi/horror films of the 50s, while simultaneously being a stealth H.P. Lovecraft adaptation *and* a preparation for Roger Corman's "Poe Cycle." In some ways, the story plays out like a gender inversion of "Fall of the House of Usher" by way of "The Shuttered Room."

While enjoying his last days of being a bachelor in France, American playboy Gerald McTeam receives an urgent letter ordering him to report to his ancestral castle in Scotland. He leaves his fiancée, Kitty, and her aunt behind, promising them he'll back in a few days. A couple of months later, he sends Aunt Edith a letter informing her that he's breaking off his engagement to Kitty. The latter just knows that something is wrong and is determined to find out the truth. Just what will the two ladies uncover at the mysterious Craven Castle?

Director William Cameron Menzies (best known for Invaders from Mars) also handled the production design and the film looks good, with regards to the sets and lighting. He also had a good cinematographer on his side, too. I thought the acting was good all around and, like The Shining, the climax is set in a creepy hedge maze. Fans of classic horror and fantasy should check this out.

Creature from the Black Lagoon (1954) - One of the greatest original monsters of the 1950s and one of the greatest monster movies of that time period...probably staying in top 5 or 10 up through the 60s. The monster suit is an inspired creation--to those not in the know, it was developed by a woman, but a man took credit for it because...sexism.

It's interesting how this never got an official Universal remake. If the Dark Universe, which seemed to have had no fewer than THREE attempts to start it, had gone forward, apparently Scarlett Johanson would have donned the iconic white one-piece. And I'm not sure when the last time we got a Gill Man monster was. The 80s gave us HUMANOIDS FROM THE DEEP and THE MONSTER SQUAD. There was one in the 90s TV movie THE PRESENCE. I don't recall any Gill Man (ersatz or not) showing up afterward. I wonder if we'll ever get a new one.


THE CREEPING UNKNOWN (1955) - Influential British sci-fi horror film about a spaceship returning from an experimental flight somewhere past the exosphere. Two of the astronauts aboard have simply vanished--we later learn of their grisly fate--and one of them is alive, but been infected with an alien lifeform. He starts killing and absorbing other organisms (including people) all over London as he evolves more and more into a monster. Only Bernard Quatermass, the scientist who developed the rocket, can save the day before the creature reproduces and puts all of humanity at risk.

I had my dad tape this off TNT one evening (back when I had an enforced bedtime) and he enjoyed it a little more than he did Five Million Years to Earth, another Quatermass film. I think I was still a bit immature for a movie like this, in which I wanted lots of monster action all the time. Today, it's a lot more easier to enjoy, especially Brian Donlevy in the role of Bernard Quatermass, playing it with Nietzschian "I am science and thus above morality" that would serve Peter Cushing well when the latter took up the mantle of Dr. Frankenstein two years later.

Curuçu, Beast of the Amazon (1956) - Probably the least known of the Universal horror/monster movies, despite having enjoyed color photography and a decent budget (as opposed to Creature from the Black Lagoon, which was filmed in the Everglades, the crew actually went to Brazil for this). It probably has a lot to do with the title being a bait n' switch: it's not really a horror movie, but a jungle adventure film that moves the story from the usual Africa to Brazil.

The story is about a monster, named Curuçu by the locals, who is killing Indian/Native Brazilian workers on plantations built along the Amazon River. One of the plantation owners decides to travel up the Amazon to find the creature, and is accompanied by an American doctor (Beverly Garland), who wants to find head-shrinking powder to assist her in her cancer research.

Lots of nature footage, although instead of the usual lions, elephants, and savannah animals, we get caimans, anacondas, piranha, tarantulas, iguanas, peccaries and jaguars. As expected for a Hollywood film of this vintage, everybody in Brazil speaks English. When characters do speak Portuguese, the white guy says, "What dialect is that?" The acting is pretty dire--even the dependable Beverly Garland is awful here. The big twist suggests that M. Night Shyamalan watched this before penning The Village.


The Daughter of Dr. Jekyll (1957) - I did Son of Dr. Jekyll a few days ago, why not check up on what his daughter is up to? This was a odd little nugget of B-cinema that purports to be a follow-up to the Jekyll story, but then switches the monster up from "violent, immoral little goblin" to a mixture of vampire and lycanthrophy legends.

The titular daughter is Jane Smith (the lovely Gloria Talbott) who has showed up at her guardian's manor--her guardian being the good Dr. Loomis--with her new beau (John Agar) in tow. One of the hired hands instantly takes a disliking to her, convinced that she's destined to commit the same crimes as her father--whom we learn is the infamous Dr. Jekyll. When murders in the local village commence, Jane begins to wonder if the effects of Jekyll's drug are hereditary.

Genre veterans will probably figure out where the story is going early on (or at least by the halfway point), and the answer to the mystery is a bizarre one. One person's conjecture about the villain's motives not only explains the film's events, but negates everything we thought we knew about the original story!


The Snorkel (1958) - Suspense film produced by Hammer Studios in Britain, the same people that made a name for themselves rebooting (to an effect) the Universal Horror Line-Up from the 30s and 40s, but in color, with more blood and cleavage (and nudity, by the end of the 60s), and starring the likes of Michael Gough, Peter Cushing, and the late Venerated Horror Film Icon Sir Christopher Lee.

The film begins with a man murdering a woman and making it look like a suicide. The woman's daughter, Candy, thinks she knows who did it. However, she has no proof, considering that the murder took place in Italy and the person she suspects was in France at the time. Candy goes on a quest to prove that person's guilt, little knowing that her efforts may either land her in a mental hospital or worse, right in the killer's hands.

There is no mystery as to the killer's identity--or motives--rather, the entertainment is derived from watching Candy come across clues (sometimes without realizing it) and then we the viewer shake our fists at the TV because *we* know she's close, but she understandably doesn't. The ending comes in three parts--the first part is wickedly ironic; the second enters a morally-gray area you wouldn't expect from a film of this vintage; and finally the film ends in a way that would satisfy those stuffy British censors.


House on Haunted Hill (1958) - This was my Halloween tradition for several years before I went on my mission back in '01. My brother Anthony and I caught this on A&E one evening and had a blast watching it. That same year, my Aunt Sandy gave me the VHS as a Christmas present. I the made it a point to watch it every year on Halloween night. Last night I made Paula and Susan watch it, although the latter fell asleep early on.

An eccentric millionaire (Vincent Price) throws a "party" at a haunted house--the site of several murders over the past few decades--at his wife's behest, offering the guests 10 grand a piece (in 50s money!) if they can make it through the night. A few hours later, there have been enough strange occurrences (and a murder, to boot) to make one wonder if a) the place is really haunted or b) someone is trying to do in the guests. Classic fun for all!

The Monster of Piedras Blancas (1959) - I used to have this Creature from the Black Lagoon knock-off on VHS. I never revisited it as much as its inspiration, mainly because it went the pseudo-mystery route and kept the monster in the shadows until the final reel. CFTBL exploited its awesome monster design for all it was worth--did this film really need to play coy with the design?

At a small coastal town somewhere in Southern California, a series of strange murders has the residents in an uproar. The victims have been found with their heads severed clean off and bereft of all their blood. Despite the local constable's attempts to pass them off as an accident, some members of the town attribute it to a local monster legend. Perhaps the curmudgeonly lighthouse keeper, who is all yellng at the residents to stay away from certain areas of the coast, knows more than he's letting on.

This is a lurid little film by 1959 standards. NOBODY is safe, including pets and children. Moreover, it gives us a skinny dippy scene and implies that the main couple are having sex on the beach--after a make-out session cribbed from From Here to Eternity. The severed heads on display make this one of the goriest sci-fi/horror up to that point, certainly from Hollywood. I just wish they showed the monster more.


Black Sunday (1960) - Italian horror film by maestro Mario Bava, one of the most visually-creative minds in the genre. I've seen this before, but wanted to revisit it to jog the ol' memory.

The film tells the story of the evil Princess Asa of Moldavia (Barbara Steele--to quote Dumb and Dumber, I could eat her liver with some Bava beans and a nice bottle of Chianti...) who, along with her manservant, is put to death for not only witchcraft, but vampirism, too! Before she dies--via getting her face skewered with a spiked mask--she pronounces a curse upon her brother, the head inquisitioner in the affair. Two centuries later, both she and her manservant are revived and go about trying to eliminate the last of her brother's line.

The film is dripping with atmosphere, complete with expert use of smoke machines and lighting (even for a black-and-white movie). There are some graphic moments by 60s standards, and the film checks off both the "vampire" and "witch" boxes for my marathon.

The Innocents (1961) - Let's end this on a respectable note. Classic ghost story, based on "The Turn of the Screw," which was adapted a couple of years ago for Netflix as "The Haunting of Bly Manor."

A governess (Deborah Kerr) goes to a huge countryside manor to take care of a rich guy's orphaned nephew and niece so he can lead the good life in London without worrying about any sort of parental responsibility. Although the governess, Miss Giddens, initially gets along with the children, the starts to feel the presence of SOMETHING ELSE in the house. The more time she spends there, the more she suspects that there are malevolent spirits out to corrupt her wards. Or are there?

The film is expertly lit and photographed (it's also a black and white movie), and the performances are uniformly strong. It is a bit slow, however, so many modern viewers might have their patience tested. The finale is pretty gutsy, as far as I can tell, and I think most people will remember the final scene quite well.