Tough Beauty and the Sloppy Slop (1995)

Tough Beauty and the Sloppy Slop (1995)
Original Title: 怒海威龍
Translation: Raging Sea Dragon

Starring: Yuen Biao, Cynthia Khan, Waise Lee Chi-Hung, Monsour Del Rosario, Billy Chow Bei-Lei, Tam Suk-Mui, Jerry Bailey, Shum Wai, Lam Wai, Alex Man Chi-Leung, Alan Chui Chung-San, Yuen Wah, Peter Chan Lung
Director: Alan Chui, Yuen Bun
Action Director(s): Alan Chui, Lee Chi-Kit

Despite being one of the greatest physical performers of all time, Yuen Biao had something of a slump during the mid-to-late 90s. He left the OUATIC franchise after the first film, which would have been solid work for the time. I assume that he had already spent enough time in the shadows of Jackie and Sammo, so he did not want that to be the case with Jet Li. So, he worked on other projects, including some wuxia films (like Deadful Melody), a OUATIC spin-off (Kick Boxer), and even his first directorial effort: The Kid from Tibet. Sadly, none of these films set the box office alight. Even a big-budgeted attempt to revive the Shaw Brothers with Hero (1997)--a remake of Boxer from Shantung--failed to garner attention.

Often when a Hong Kong action actor career flounders, the alternative is making low-budget action schlock in Thailand or, even worse, Filipino productions. Many Hong Kong actors had strong followings there, especially Girls n' Guns actresses like Cynthia Khan and Yukari Oshima (known there as Cynthia Luster). The last gasps of breath of the Girls n' Guns genre were made mainly in the Philippines, who seemed to still enjoy that sort of thing. Yuen Biao found himself in a few Filipino cheapies during the second half of the 1990s, with the nadir being The Millennium Dragon--which might not have been a Filipino film, but it was a Philip Ko Fei production, who worked on a lot of those. So, I'll lump that with the likes of this and The Hunted Hunter.

Tough Beauty and the Sloppy Slop is a low-budget remake of Police Story III: Supercop, with the premise of a hard-line Mainland policewoman teaming up with a Hong Kong cop to bring down drug dealers in SE Asia...although this time we have the Philippines standing in for Malaysia and Thailand. The film begins with a pair of Filipino policemen, Officers Wan (Alex Man, of The Dragon Fighter and Super Lady Cop) and Sandos (Monsour del Rosario, of Ultracop 2000 and The Trigonal), busting a bunch of drug dealers after a pitched gunfight near a bus. Later that evening, they arrest a lady named Yu Yung-Chi (Tam Suk-Mui, of Tiger Cage III and Royal Tramp 2), the wife of the head drug dealer, Wai (Waise Lee, of A Better Tomorrow and Bullet in the Head). Wai gets his revenge by having Officer Wan gunned down in front of his family at his mother's birthday party. Sucks to be her.

Shortly afterward, Mainland policewoman Captain Yiang (Cynthia Khan, of Yes Madam '92 and In the Line of Duty V) is busting some drug dealers, including Yuen Wah. She learns that the money used in the deal was counterfeit and that a drug ring based in the Philippines has been used counterfeit money to buy drugs from Mainland dealers, which is then sold in Hong Kong. She is given the mission of befriending Yu Yung-Chi and finding out who's behind all of this. As per her cover, her "husband" will be a Hong Kong cop named Li Chin-Tang (Yuen Biao), who's working undercover in the Philippines.

Yiang goes to a Filipino jail as an inmate and befriends Chi after protecting her from the fat lesbian rapist girlboss. Li Chin-Tang arranges for them to escape by feigning illness, at which point he'll hijack the ambulance and get them to safety. The plan works, although not quite as planned--they could have had it go wrong in catastrophic ways for maximum comedy gold. A grateful Chi invites them back to her house, since they're now fugitives. Wai offers to let him join his gang, although not before he gives Li a chance to prove himself. First, he has to spring the drug dealers from the first scene out of prison. Then, he has to kill Sandos, who is his contact with local law enforcement.

Li eventually catches the attention of Wai's boss, played by Billy Chow (of The Gambling Baron and Fist of Legend). Wai gets mad at Li for showing him up, and starts to suspect him even more after a run-in with another criminal (a cameo by Alan Chui) at a nightclub. It will not be long before Li and Yiang's cover is blown...

As a budget alternative for Supercop, Tough Beauty and the Sloppy Slop does an alright job. There is enough action to satisfy, if not fill you up completely. And Yuen Biao's charisma is a highlight as he BS's his way through his role as the undercover cop. The film has a strong cast of HK action veterans, from Biao to Wah to Chow to Khan. Look for Shum Wai in a cameo as a drug dealer at the villain's headquarters, similar to a cameo he had in Supercop.

I do wish more of the movie had focused on the interplay between Khan and Yuen Biao. Their early scenes are funny, with Biao stealing kisses from her for the sake of "their cover," much to Khan's chagrin. Most viewers will remember their first night at Waise Lee's house, where the two get into a kung fu fight that everybody mistakens for rough bedroom activity. Khan does drift a bit more into the background as the film progresses, standing out again only once the climax starts.

The action was staged by Alan Chui (The Rebellious Reign and Shaolin Temple Against Lama) and Lee Chi-Kit (Vampire vs. Vampire and Magic Cop). I never considered the latter, who is actually Sammo Hung's brother, one of the heavy hitters: he was a C-lister at best. He worked with his brother on a lot of the latter's later films and on a number of post-Mr. Vampire jianshi movies, too. Alan Chui was a bit more distinguished, although he still was not working at his best like he had done during the old school days. Chui spent the last decades of his career mainly leading wire crews on Hong Kong TV, which makes sense you see how many people get knocked back dozens of feet from being kicked or shot in this film.

Despite being directed by Yuen Bun, the gunplay sequences are nothing really special. Bun himself had done some great gunplay in films like City War and Just Heroes. But he relegates the gunplay duties to Chui and Lee, who take the Commando approach to the firefights: people fire a 3-round burst from an M-16 and the camera cuts to three or four stuntmen falling over. Rinse and repeat. The finale is reminiscent of the Thai village sequence in Supercop, although not quite as explosive.

The fighting is limited to a handful of short skirmishes here and there: Cynthia Khan throws a few kicks against Yuen Wah; Khan and Biao beat up Waise Lee's men; the aforementioned kung fu bedroom scene, etc. The only real sustained fighting comes at the end, when Khan, Biao and Rosario face off with Billy Chow, who plays the nigh-unbeatable villain. There are lots of nice kicks from both Biao and Chow. It is not Biao's best 1990s performance, but he could still bust a move in 1995. I just wish there was more (and better) fighting from both him and Khan, who both deserved better. That said, this is still light years ahead of crap like Yes Madam 5.